Tuesday, December 18, 2012

An Unexpected Tuesday

Earlier this week I saw a post on our social workers Facebook page. "Looking to find a new home for an artificial Christmas tree." I noticed "J" had commented in the post that she knew of a house that needed one. Unfortunately, the tree in the post had already been spoken for. We had purchased a new tree on Black Friday and had an old tree that we could donate so I texted "J" and offered her the tree. (I am the crazy one has 3 trees up in her house. One real, two artificial. We certainly did not need a fourth!).

Yesterday I got a text back from "J" that said, "Thanks for the offer but I can't find a way to get the tree from you." I had already taken the day off work to go to Gus' preschool party and was going to spend the afternoon as Santa's helper and get caught up for Christmas. So I responded and told her that I could drop it off on Tuesday afternoon....just needed to know where to take it. She gave me an address and told me that she would meet me there.

That got me thinking. Was she expecting Gus to be with me? Did she want to see him? Would she prefer not to? She hadn't seen him since the day she left the hospital. We send pictures and texts and Gus had a FB page just for her to see but she has never asked to see him. So did she even want to? Would she be disappointed if I showed up without him?

I quick called up Joel and asked what he thought. Should we offer? Or should I go alone like I originally planned? We decided that we would offer. We let her know that it was okay either way but that the choice was hers. She quickly responded, "that would be great to see him!" So there you have it....Gus was going to meet his birthmom the next day!

Joel and I talked to Gus about it and told him that we were going to go see "J". When we explain adoption to Gus we tell him that he grew in "J's" belly and then she gave him to us to keep forever and ever. So when we talked with Gus about what was going to happen he asked, "is she gonna take me back?" As I struggled to breathe and answer him, I quickly questioned whether or not I should take him the next day. I panicked for a moment before taking a deep breath and explaining to him. "No. In fact, he was gonna stay with me and Dadoh and Penny forever and ever." He seemed very content with that answer and bounded off to play. But what a huge question from a 3 year old! I was a little nervous about how he would react the next day but decided that we were gonna go anyway.

Gus and I spent the morning at his preschool for the Christmas party. I love that I am able to take time from school for things like that. I think it is really important to share the love of learning with your kids! Afterwards we headed north to "J".

We got to her house and unloaded the Christmas tree and then went in to chat. We got to meet her roommates and Gus ran around like crazy checking out all of their Christmas decorations and found a coloring book to play with. He talked to all of them and told them stories. He "read" them a book and was a little show off. "J" and her roommates all chatted for a bit. Got a few pictures of "J" and Gus and got ready to head home. Overall it was very relaxed and I was surprised at how easy it was.

I am happy that it went so smoothly and would be completely fine with meeting up again sometime. I knew that when we chose adoption, days like today would happen. I just didn't know that it would happen so unexpectedly on a random Tuesday.

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